i feel like i’m going through second wave high school social dynamics… actually being forced to go through the same process of consciously electing to spend my time with “less cool” people that are relatable and supportive and unabashedly individualistic over the freaky cool kids jocks/cheerleaders dynamic that perpetuates my anxiety and is needlessly, childishly misogynistic, superficial and void beneath the facade of attractive distractions. people dressed to impress and up to date on all the shit they have to know about, guarding their territory (rightfully so, cause that’s what you gotta do when you care about something, especially in NYC where if you don’t watch yourself it’s gonna get the shit cloned and commodified out of it), but perpetuating the same shitty, baseless exclusivity and negative as hell popularity contest bullshit that made me stop wanting to “fit in” in high school in the first place. not that everyone is making me feel this way, but i see it getting worse and worse (or maybe i’m just noticing it more) the longer i live here. i care about this shit, the “scene” is one of the reasons i moved to new york, and socially, lately this shit has been a fucking bummer.. it boggles my mind that i can feel so socially threatened and ostracized by people i’ve known for years over what are clearly inconsequential things like differences in taste or spending time with people that have not been knighted as lords of the punk scene. does this really have to be a thing right now? i don’t wanna hate people who are on the same side as me, can you guys just grow up so we can all get along? how come there is a rift analogous to high school cliquery in the only “subculture” i care about? why do i have to be stuck in the middle of it?